Image: Midjourney/ MomJunction Design Team
You met an interesting guy and struck the right chords immediately. You might also have good chemistry, but you think he is sending mixed signals. What could be the signs a guy is scared of his feelings for you? He may seem a little detached, disinterested, reticent, or withdrawn. He could also be afraid of heartbreak, embarrassment, or rejection. Decoding such signs can help you recognize his feelings and help you communicate more openly about your emotions.
If you think the guy has feelings for you but is staying aloof because of his apprehensive nature, you may approach him. By bringing him into your comfort zone, you can foster an environment of trust and vulnerability and make him feel safe to express his feelings for you. Read this post to know the common signs that a guy is scared of his feelings for you.
Key Pointers
- If a guy stares at you when you are not noticing or feels shy to talk when you are around, it may mean he has feelings for you but is scared to express them.
- He may often joke about going on a date with you, remember your smallest details, or start avoiding you for no reason.
- Take notice of these signs and provide gentle indications to remove fear from the relationship and develop better communication.
15 Signs A Guy Is Scared Of His Feelings For You
Everyone has a different personality and unique approach to romance. However, some common factors explain why some men hide their true feelings. Here are reasons why some men find it difficult to open up.
1. His behavior changes for no apparent reason
Image: IStock
This rule does not apply if you have just met someone. However, if you have been friends for a long time, you will notice that his behavior changes for no apparent reason. Any significant change in behavior or your interactions indicates that he no longer sees you as a mere friend and may wish more from the relationship. If his behavior becomes less friendly and he seems to be hiding his true feelings, he may be starting to see you more romantically.
2. You catch him staring at you
If you find him staring at you intently or more nonchalantly from time to time, this is a tangible sign that he may see you as more than just your friend. It is more evident if he stares at you when he thinks you are not noticing it. Being around the object of one’s affection can be intoxicating to someone who is in love and is fretful to make the first move.
3. You keep running into each other
If you seem to frequently “bump into each other,” be aware that this may not be a coincidence. You may meet him more often at the grocery store or gym or when walking your dog. He may even suggest that he give you a ride home because he has something to do “on the way.” In any case, if he finds an excuse to spend more time with you, this is a positive sign that he likes you, and is hesitant or afraid to take any action.
4. He acts differently when you’re around
You can observe his behavior when he is with his friends or family vis-à-vis when you are around him. You will find him a whole different person, and his behavior changes when you are around him. If he acts shy or is unable to articulate himself, it means he’s flustered and embarrassed by what you might have to think of what he says. If he doesn’t talk much at all and looks anxious, it’s another signal that he has feelings for you but doesn’t know how to articulate them to you.
5. He wants to be your hero
Image: IStock
Even if he is not openly flirtatious or does not make any comments to suggest that he likes you, he will still want to “take care of you.” He will drop you home when it’s late. He will help you carry things and even help you cross the road to make you feel safe. Such behavior is a well-documented phenomenon called “hero instinct.” Typically, men have the “hero instinct” if they are romantically inclined towards women.
6. He often jokes that he wants to date you
He would joke that the two of you are dating and then laugh. Although you may think he is fooling around, he may have a deeper motive. He may say, “Imagine you and me dating!” as he laughs. He may be eliciting your reaction or response. This is his timid yet edgy attempt to test, to see how you react about the idea of dating. Such behavior could be on a platonic level. However, if it happens too often, then he may be suppressing his feelings for you.
7. He’s nervous when you’re around
This is a dead giveaway. It is one of the clearest signs a guy is fighting his feelings for you, especially if you both have been friends for some time. If you find him nervous, jittery, or fidgety when you are around, it could indicate that he wants to reveal his heart but cannot. You can test the waters by asking him if everything is okay and watch his reaction. He will likely be tongue-tied and say everything is fine and make some excuse for acting out of character, or he may even confess his feelings for you now that you have brought it up. He may even think that you have figured it out from some other source.
Quick tip8. He remembers the smallest of details
Image: IStock
He remembers the minutest details, such as the day or date you first met him, the song you played in his car, or what you wore two weeks ago. He treasures every moment and thing you share with him. Such attention to detail indicates that he values your connection and is likely afraid to jeopardize it by expressing his feelings too openly. Acknowledging these moments can help reinforce your bond and encourage him to share more.
9. He’s jealous, but he won’t admit it
Jealousy is often the most apparent indicator of someone’s emotions. If he gets jealous of you around someone else, it could be because he just thinks they’re not a good fit for you. But that is unlikely if you’re just friends. If he is jealous, he will be fretful and disquieted. His body language or attitude towards the other guy will reflect in his feelings for you. He may clench his fists, or he may be rude to the other guy. It is an indirect indication that he wants you to be around him. He may not harbor negative feelings if he isn’t intimidated and doesn’t see the other guy as his competitor.
10. His mood fluctuates a lot around you
He will have mood swings and blow hot and cold. He will be happy for a moment and suddenly feel insecure, uncertain, or unhappy the next moment. Such mood fluctuations and inner turmoil are signs of a guy confused about his feelings for you. It could also indicate that he is grappling with a conflict between desire and the fear of vulnerability. Understanding this can help you approach the situation with empathy and patience. Give him some time, and don’t take his mood swings to heart, as his intentions are good.
11. He’s avoiding you for no reason
People handle fear in different ways. Some people confront it, while others may prefer to avoid it. He may try to avoid you as a defense mechanism for fear of rejection. He will establish contact with you by texting or calling you but may not physically meet you to avoid any embarrassment or mask and hide his true feelings.
12. He values your advice more than his other friends
Image: IStock
We all take advice from friends and family about various things. But if you find that he turns to you for advice about important things such as career decisions, health issues, or family problems, he immensely values your opinion. At the very least, you are his closest friend and confidante. It suggests he has some feelings for you but is afraid to say it.
13. His friends seem to know something is up
While he might be able to keep his feelings a secret from you, he may confide his true feelings to his friends. If he is tight-lipped about how he feels about you, but his friends act awkward or differently around you, there’s a good sign he has feelings for you but is too perturbed to tell you. His friends’ typical behavior may include teasing, asking you how you feel about him, or even indirectly hinting that he likes you.
14. He puts effort into his appearance around you
Image: Shutterstock
Many things make people want to dress better or groom more carefully. However, if you notice that he takes extra effort to put up his best appearance, it indicates that he has feelings for you. At work or with his friends, he may be dressed casually. But when you are around, he is self-conscious and is immaculately dressed, indicating that he is trying to impress you.
15. He doesn’t talk about relationships
It is perfectly normal to discuss relationships with friends from time to time. If you find that he is reluctant or outright refuses to discuss this with you, it’s a sign he might have feelings for you. He may give you relationship advice and listen to all your feelings about your ex-boyfriend, but he does not comment on his relationships. An excellent way to test is by asking him if he’s been interested in anyone lately and observe his reaction. He may be reluctant, agitated, or entirely in a denial mode. It indicates that he is emotionally available but lacks the courage to express his feelings.
Frequently Asked Questions
1. How can I help a guy overcome his fear of his feelings for me?
To help a guy overcome his fear of his feelings for you, encourage open and honest conversation about your feelings and encourage him to share his. While open dialogue can pave the way for a deeper connection, avoid putting pressure on him. Instead, try to build trust by creating a safe space for him to talk and validate or reassure him about his feelings.
2. Is it common for guys to hide or suppress their feelings out of fear of rejection or vulnerability?
Yes, it is common for guys to hide or suppress their feelings out of fear of rejection or vulnerability. Some of the reasons why guys act distant when they like you include societal expectations and gender roles that promote the idea of men being strong and stoic.
3. Can guys eventually overcome their fear of their feelings and pursue a relationship with someone they like?
Yes, guys can overcome their fear of vulnerability and pursue relationships with people they like. It requires self-reflection, identifying the root cause of fear, seeking support from friends or a therapist, and engaging in activities that promote emotional openness. It takes time and effort, but with persistence and patience, guys can develop the skills and confidence needed for emotional intimacy in a relationship.
Being in love is a wonderful feeling but could also make one feel skittish and fearful. Moreover, when in love, men are timid and may not reveal their feelings for various reasons. If you want to know whether a man likes you but is scared to express it, these are some obvious signs a guy is scared of his feelings for you. He may be shying away from talking about his feelings as he fears rejection or does not want to end the friendship with you. Knowing the above signs will help you take the next step if you like him. Otherwise, you may politely tell him to avoid reinforcing fears about relationships.
Infographic: Telling Your Feelings For Him When He is Scared Of His Feelings For You
If you were able to place a tick in some of the boxes of the signs, then by now, you must be pretty sure that his fear is letting him hold back his feelings for you. So, how do you communicate with him and tell him that there is nothing to be scared of and that you feel the same way about him too? Well, the answer to it lies in the following infographic. We have listed a few ways with the help of which you can tell your feelings to him. Read on and also save it for future reference. Illustration: Momjunction Design Team
Illustration: Clear Signs A Guy Is Scared Of His Feelings For You
Image: Dall·E/MomJunction Design Team
Ever wondered how men behave when they are in love? Understand the hidden cues and subtle hints to determine if he is scared to express his feelings for you.
Community Experiences
Join the conversation and become a part of our nurturing community! Share your stories, experiences, and insights to connect with fellow parents.
Read full bio of Sharon Gilchrest O’Neill
Read full bio of Rohan Sinha
Read full bio of Akshay Nair
Read full bio of N Pravenchandra Singh
