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It is tough to break up and disengage with someone you love. The emotional challenges can be overwhelming, including feelings of guilt, sadness, and fear of being alone. For the sake of your peace of mind and self-respect, you should know when to walk away from a relationship. We all need to make some tough calls to lead a better life. One should never compromise on peace and dignity. Being in an unhappy relationship will make you feel miserable, incomplete, lonely, and constantly disappointed, and no one should settle for such a relationship.
Being in a toxic relationship can make you feel awkward while getting intimate or imagining a life together. Read this post as we tell you about when is the right time to walk away from a relationship.
Key Pointers
- Walking away from a relationship can be a tough decision to make, but it is important for your mental health.
- If your significant other does not value you or the relationship has taken a toxic turn, it might be time to leave.
- The involvement of abuse in the relationship is a surefire sign of walking away.
Is It Okay To Walk Away From A Relationship?
Yes, it is okay to walk away from a toxic relationship. If you feel unhappy and dissatisfied in your relationship, it is not wrong to find your happiness. Your relationship with yourself is undoubtedly the most important one and the first relationship of your life.
Relationships thrive when you honor your commitments, keep your promises, spend quality time with each other, and share responsibilities. However, when you have put in all the effort that you possibly could into your relationship, but your partner does not reciprocate, it might be time to quit the relationship and move on to find your happiness.
According to Kimberly, a blogger, her relationship became so imprinted in her brain that it was almost like she was breathing. “I didn’t have to think about it; it was just there. I had completely lost myself in this relationship. I had nothing that was mine, no personality of my own. I had given up everything that makes me me in order to fit the relationship that my partner needed. I was a supporting character in someone else’s story (i),” she says.
Read on as we tell you a few signs, some subtle and others obvious, that can help you know if it’s time to walk away from your relationship.
19 Signs It Might Be Time To Walk Away From A Relationship
It is important to recognize the signs that a relationship may no longer be working for you. In a study published in Emerg Adulthood, researchers observed 160 emerging adults who ended their relationships. Their conclusion was that individuals who comprehended the reasons for their break-up succeeded in subsequent relationships and had better mental health outcomes compared to those who did not (1). Below are some common indicators that suggest it might be time to prioritize your well-being and consider moving on.
1. They do not respect you
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Respect is the essence of any successful relationship, and when there’s a lack of respect in a relationship, it indicates an imbalanced partnership. If you feel your partner doesn’t respect your feelings, thoughts, goals, and needs, you should be concerned. A disrespectful partner will disapprove of your opinions and decisions, look down upon you, and neglect your efforts to make your relationship happy. For instance, they may make derisive comments about your career decisions, dismiss your ambitions, or belittle your opinions in front of their friends. If your partner manifests all these signs of disrespect, it might be time for you to walk away and cut ties with them. Without respect, it is impossible to mature and grow together.
2. There’s no trust between you
If there is no trust between you two, your relationship is bound to crumble and break off. When your partner knows about your insecurities but still does not feel the need to resolve them and gain your trust, and if their actions and words do not merit your confidence, withdraw from the relationship and walk away. Does your partner constantly check your phone or accuse you of dishonesty without cause? It might be time to walk away.
3. They do not value you
Love blooms when you value each other and care for each other. A partner who values you will ask for your opinion on important matters, give you space to take up your hobbies and interests, and do everything they possibly can to keep you happy. If you feel that none of these are happening and your relationship has become one-sided, you should consider separation and rethink why you are in such a relationship. For instance, if you support them in all their decisions and appreciate their efforts, but they do not praise or acknowledge you, it may be time to move on. After all, a relationship cannot thrive without mutual appreciation.
4. There is abuse involved
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The relationship should end the moment abuse begins. Physical abuse is not the only kind of abuse you should be worried about. Verbal abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, and any form of abuse should not be tolerated. Watch out for insulting and offensive comments about your abilities and appearance or the use of your insecurities and vulnerabilities against you. Abuse majorly impacts your self-esteem, sense of identity, and confidence, and may even lead to depression. If there is abuse involved, you should terminate the relationship without giving your partner a second chance.
5. The relationship has become toxic
When partners do not support each other in any situation, are in constant conflict, and jealousy, competition, and dishonesty creep in, the relationship has become toxic. If this is the case in your relationship, it can take a toll on your physical, mental, and emotional health. It can also affect your self-esteem. Thus, you should split up and walk away from the relationship to heal.
6. They have cheated
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If you have enough proof that your partner has cheated or is cheating on you, but they deny it or don’t seem to regret their act, you should finalize your decision and part ways with them. For instance, you may find incriminating texts on their phone or see them regularly flirting with their ex or colleague. The very fact that they are not remorseful is a clear indication that they would do it again, and you do not want to be with such a person.
7. Communication between you two has broken down
Good communication is vital to any healthy relationship. If you are unable to communicate with each other, your relationship cannot survive. When you are not able to communicate, have meaningful conversations, or develop a deep intimacy, misunderstandings become common. Your attempts at communication result in defensive responses or silence instead of a positive resolution. You also start fantasizing about how your life would be without your partner. An irresolvable communication gap is an alarming sign that you might need to conclude and walk away from your relationship.
Point to consider8. They are selfish
It is hard to be around a selfish partner. When your partner is focussed on themselves, doesn’t take an interest in your interests, doesn’t reciprocate your needs, monopolizes your time, manipulates you with tactics like guilt-tripping, and has a dominating behavior that you can’t stand anymore, you should consider walking towards the finish line and stay away from such a relationship.
9. They take you for granted
When your partner takes you for granted, it signifies that they no longer care for you. They might make you plan dates, take care of all household duties, and expect you to handle all your issues on your own without bothering to lend a hand. If you feel you are being taken for granted, it’s time to act for yourself. Try to solve this issue by making your partner aware of the situation. And even after constantly emphasizing how you feel neglected, if they are unwilling to work on it, it’s time to make a decision.
10. They do not have a sense of responsibility
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A responsible person is dependable. When your partner does not take responsibility and is not aware of their obligations to keep your relationship going, they can’t be relied on. Your partner may avoid commitments like paying bills, addressing relationship issues, or meeting deadlines. In a relationship, both the partners need to share responsibilities. If you are the only one who is taking on responsibilities, consider walking away.
Alisha Revel, a Youtuber, left her fiance two years ago on account of an addiction problem he was facing. Four months before their wedding, she asked him to see a counselor for his addiction problem. He ignored her request the first few times by saying he was busy. And when requested repeatedly, he completely ignored her request and flew off to North Carolina for a work-related commitment. This, to her, was reason number one. She says, “That’s what led to the doubts rising, kind of like bubbles rising up to the surface. I was crying for days when he went to North Carolina (ii).”
11. You are the only one who is making compromises and sacrifices
When two people share a common life, they bring along their own set of baggage and flaws. They need to consider each other’s feelings and make some adjustments to get everything to work. Making small compromises and sacrifices helps build a strong relationship, and the adjustments, compromises, and sacrifices should always be from both sides. But, are you the only one making compromises and sacrifices? Are you rearranging your schedules and readjusting your values, goals, and desires? If yes, your relationship is unbalanced, and you should consider walking away from the relationship.
12. You and your partner are incompatible
It’s completely normal if you both have individual differences in your choices and likings. It will give you a chance to explore new experiences in life. However, what if your aspirations, core values, and beliefs differ significantly? For instance, you want to travel the world, but they want to stay in their hometown forever. You could also have completely different philosophies on life, parenting, and future goals too. If you are incapable of coexisting, you should walk away from the relationship.
13. You don’t spend enough quality time together
Quality time is when you spend time together doing things you both love and giving your full attention to each other to show your affection, appreciation, and care. Spending quality time together is necessary for your connection to last. Does your partner show disinterest in spending quality time with you? Do they spend all their time with their friends or on work, hobbies, or other commitments without bothering to spend meaningful quality time with you? If yes, then contemplate walking away from the relationship, because you deserve to be loved.
Do remember14. You don’t feel comfortable
Being comfortable with each other is the foundation for keeping your relationship happy. An uncomfortable relationship is one where you feel weird being around each other and can’t be yourself. If you do not feel comfortable expressing your deepest feelings to each other, are afraid of being vulnerable around them, or constantly fear being judged or ridiculed, you are probably in an unhealthy relationship and should walk out of this relationship.
15. You feel your partner is emotionally immature
An emotionally immature person lacks the ability to understand and handle their own emotions and feelings and empathize with people. You will notice commitment issues, disagreements, defensiveness, and loneliness with an immature person. Being in a relationship with an immature partner contributes to uncertainty in life. Does your partner fail to accept their mistakes, understand their responsibilities, and support you? Do they always blame you and never bother discussing serious issues? Rethink about staying in a relationship with such a person.
16. They indulge in body shaming
Does your partner pay more attention to outer appearance than the beauty of a person’s heart? And do they indulge in body shaming? It is one of the clearest red flags in a relationship and a sign that they are immature, ignorant, and abusive. When you are with such a person, it could compel you to see yourself differently, in a negative way, and lead to depression. They may demean you for gaining weight, make you feel worthless, and convince you that no one other than them will ever love you. If you are a victim of comments that gag you from within, say goodbye and go your way.
17. They have lost interest in you
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Do you feel your partner runs away from problems and shows disinterest when you suggest ideas or plans?Do they avoid becoming physically or emotionally intimate with you and show disinterest in your conversations? When you feel that they do not show passion any longer, and you are the only one trying to keep the relationship alive, it’s time to exit the relationship and move on.
18. You do not find a sense of fulfillment
We expect to be treated with love, kindness, care, affection, and respect. Fulfillment forms the basis of whether the partnership could be successful in the long run. If you both are willing to live up to each other’s unbiased expectations and help each other grow, you will find fulfillment in the relationship.
The relationship will strengthen when you focus on appreciating each other’s efforts. When the relationship is unfulfilling, you may feel lonely, despondent, unappreciated, or stagnant, even when together. If that is the case with you, it may be time to walk away from the relationship.
19. They do not respect your personal space
In a healthy relationship, each partner works at helping the other person grow. While spending time together, doing fun things together, and having common goals are all fine, you should also be able to take up your own interests and hobbies. When you can take care of your personal needs, you’ll be able to take care of your relationship. You should be able to pursue your interests, passions, dreams, and goals, and more importantly, be yourself. If you do not get any of these and your partner actively discourages you from pursuing your interests, hobbies, and friends and monitors your activities, you might need to get vocal. If that doesn’t work either, walk away.
Steps To Take Before Walking Away From A Relationship
Now that you have noted the signs that you may need to walk away from your relationship, follow a few steps before ending it.
- Think about your reasons: Take note of the signs that your needs are unmet or patterns of behavior that are toxic. Analyze them to see why you have come to this decision.
- Attempt to communicate: Have you expressed your concerns to your partner? Have an honest conversation with them and consider if your issues can be resolved through mutual effort.
- Consider professional help: Couples counseling or therapy can help you resolve issues that you cannot handle on your own. A third person’s perspective may guide you and help you decide whether the relationship is salvageable or not.
- Think of logistics: If you share a living space, have joint investments, or have children, you must address these before taking the next step toward separation.
- Prepare for the final conversation: Once you have arrived at your decision, approach the break-up with empathy and patience. Choose the right time and place, be clear about your reasons, understand your partner’s point of view, and be respectful. Also, be prepared to face an emotional reaction.
- Set firm boundaries: Decide on the level of contact you wish to maintain after the relationship ends. Maintain this boundary so you can both heal emotionally and avoid distressing yourselves.
- Seek support and reflect: Reach out to your close and trusted friends and family for support before, during, and after the break-up. Reflect on the lessons you’ve learned in the relationship to realize why you walked away and resolve to keep these lessons in mind for the future.
Why Is Walking Away So Powerful
Walking away from a relationship could be one of the most difficult decisions. It could be done for various reasons. For some, it could be for self-love, while for a few, it could reflect strength and resilience.
For someone who has walked out of a toxic relationship, the decision communicates that certain behaviors cannot be tolerated, irrespective of emotional connection, prioritizing self-respect. On the other hand, giving up on love also reflects an act of self-love and choosing well-being and happiness. Sometimes, coming out of situations that devalue your existence or identity is important.
Though you have walked out, coping with the situation could be challenging. Try to embrace change and new opportunities. Take your time, and do not push yourself towards the change. With time, you will realize that your decision was right and that helped you evolve.
Frequently Asked Questions
1. How to walk away from a relationship when we still love them?
Goodbyes are heartbreaking and painful but have a bigger motive in the long run. When love and romance begin to fade away, the relationship gets physically and emotionally draining; priorities change, don’t see a future together, then it is better for you to let go of them. Staying together if the relationship is unhealthy can further damage the equation between couples. Therefore, if you notice signs that your relationship is over, it is better to call it quits before the relationship causes further damage.
2. When should I walk away from a toxic relationship?
Staying in a toxic relationship can take a toll on your physical, mental, and emotional health. You may love them deeply, but when a relationship hits rock bottom, feelings of dislike, jealousy, and hate may creep in. Also, when you see no future with them and continue to suffer day in and day out, it is time to take a stand for yourself and part ways with a toxic partner.
3. Is it possible to save a relationship if one person wants to walk away?
Keeping a relationship alive when one person wants to leave can be challenging. Both partners must be prepared to communicate, address underlying problems, and work together to find a solution. However, the desire to fix a broken relationship ultimately depends on the specific circumstance and the commitment of both individuals.
4. Should I fight for my relationship or walk away?
Whether to fight for a relationship or walk away is a personal choice. Consider factors such as communication, trust, compatibility, and overall happiness. Reflect on your needs and values, seek necessary advice, and trust your intuition to make your best decision. Also, when you see signs that your partner wants to leave you, it might indicate they have already preparing to move on. Remember not to force the other person to be with you against their will, as such a relationship can cause distress to you and your partner.
5. How does a man feel when a woman walks away?
A man’s reactions to a woman walking away may vary depending on the circumstances. Based on the depth of their connection and individual circumstances, he may feel a range of emotions, including sadness, confusion, loss, or a sense of rejection.
6. What are the benefits of walking away from a difficult relationship?
Leaving a challenging relationship has several advantages. It enables people to prioritize health, rebuild self-esteem, and find happiness. It makes room for one’s development, provides freedom from toxicity, and opens doors to future opportunities for happier, more mutually rewarding relationships.
7. How can I prepare for a better life after leaving a relationship?
Focus on self-care and engage in activities that bring purpose and fulfillment. Avoid rewinding and rethinking memories from your relationship since that may slow down your progress of moving on with life. Surround yourself with positive sources of influence, such as people, literature, or music, that foster a sense of contentment in life. Remember, healing is a journey, and taking it one step at a time is okay.
It is better to leave the table where respect is no longer served. Lack of respect and trust are prime indicators of when to walk away from the relationship. If your partner does not value you enough or starts hurling abuses during an argument, then it may be time you draw the line. If you are not comfortable in a relationship, find your partner immature and irresponsible, or do not find fulfillment, you may need to walk away before the relationship turns toxic and ugly. Admire and acknowledge your worth, spend time on self-love, and set your life goals for a happier future. If you find yourself overwhelmed by these feelings, consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor who would help you during this difficult time.
Infographic: How To Walk Away From A Relationship Gracefully?
Breakups can be challenging. However, ending a relationship sometimes becomes necessary to safeguard one’s mental and emotional well-being. In such scenarios, parting ways while maintaining self-esteem and self-respect makes moving on easier for both partners. Our infographic shares practical tips on how an individual can walk away from a relationship with poise. Illustration: Momjunction Design Team
Illustration: Clear Signs To Know When To Walk Away From A Relationship
Image: Dall·E/MomJunction Design Team
Personal Experience: Sources
MomJunction articles include first-hand experiences to provide you with better insights through real-life narratives. Here are the sources of personal accounts referenced in this article.
i. My breakup story;https://www.thinkgypsy.com/talk-about-life/45114/my-breakup-story
ii. Why I left my fiance;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnzODBhF2OY
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