It is normal to think about how to make your ex miss you while you are going through a breakup and still hoping to get back with them. Breakup is a time when you have conflicting thoughts, and you may pine for their presence, calls, or texts and want them to miss you. There are some ways to make them crave you and renew the relationship if there is any chance. However, if there is no interest left, it is always better to move on to become a better version of yourself. Read on to learn a few tips to make your ex miss you and want to get back with you.
Key Pointers
- Allow yourself some healing time before you attempt to get back with your ex.
- Avoid stalking your ex, and do not overexpress yourself if you wish to make your ex miss you.
- Try to communicate and initiate a good, comfortable conversation.
- Do not dwell on the negatives of the past and avoid being an attention seeker.
20 Ways To Make Your Ex Miss You
- Do not initiate contact: It is rightly said that distance makes the heart grow fonder. Therefore, avoid initiating contact with your ex. If you are too eager and quick to talk to them or see them, it will send a message that you miss and yearn for them, which you wouldn’t want to convey. Give them time and a chance to miss you.
Rose, a college student who has gone through a breakup, says, “In two weeks, I broke the no-contact rule twice. And regretted both times so badly. Don’t talk to your ex for a month straight, at least. I’m seriously not kidding. All you get from breaking the no contact rule is a short, inconsiderate reply that will probably just hurt you more and get you more stuck in feeling like shit (i).”
- Do not respond to texts or calls: It is a tried and tested rule for many. Hold yourself while responding to their calls or texts within the first initial weeks. They may try to get in touch to ease the pain of breaking up with you. Make that waiting period longer to give them a chance to revisit and reminisce about the past.
A radio and journalism student who goes by the name Mac, shares her experience of responding to her ex’s text messages. She says, “A delayed reply is what I chose to do before trying to have a normal friendly conversation with my ex. But beware, because no matter how long you delay, they will bring up the past if they miss you or have a secret agenda! There’s no escaping, it to be honest (ii).”
- Take a vacation: It’s natural to mourn the end of a relationship but don’t let it consume you. Go on a holiday or take a break. This will ensure that you not only get time for yourself, but also avoid running into your ex in the same city.
- Give yourself time: After a break-up, do not let situations take control of you. Take a step back and pull yourself together. Give yourself time to heal, especially if you want to get back together. Recuperate yourself and think about your relationship from a newer perspective.
- Avoid stalking your ex: In the world of social media, it might not be difficult to know what your ex is up to. That said, avoid the urge to know about your ex’s whereabouts or the friends they are mingling with. Succumbing to the temptation will make you look desperate and take away the time and space you need.
- Do not overexpress yourself: Do not pour your heart out on social media where your ex can track your activities. In fact, avoid talking about your break up at all in the virtual world. The inactivity and silence from your side will surely make them wonder.
- Meet new people: Although you may feel an ache in your heart after the breakup, channel that energy into positive activities. Meeting new people and making new friends will bring confidence and give you a chance to outgrow yourself. This will also show that you are capable of creating your own social circle. And guess what! It could give you a break from people you would want to avoid.
- Explore the dating world: Break-up doesn’t mean you need to stop going out. Go on dates with other people. When your ex learns that you are making progress and having fun, they will think about you and may crave your attention. However, be cautious because jumping into the dating world after a breakup might lead to impulsive decisions and poor coping.
- Follow your interests: This trick will add new dimensions to your personality, and you will learn more about yourself. Your ex will miss you when they realize that you are having fun picking up a hobby and enjoying yourself.
- Pamper yourself: Reflect on the aspects of the relationship that didn’t work out, but don’t dwell on regret. Focus on yourself, and take care of yourself. Instead of caving into your emotions and indulging in junk, comfort food, make healthy food and lifestyle choices. Develop a hunger for personal success and self-improvement. When you feel good about yourself, it shows in your personality, and your ex will be drawn to you.
- Try a new look: Why not reinvent yourself and try something new? You do not need to change your wardrobe completely or go for a total makeover. Simple and small changes that go with your personality, like a new haircut or new clothes, can give you more confidence, which can make your ex miss you more.
- Do not lose yourself: When you initiate contact with your ex, be yourself. If you happen to meet somehow, be calm and polite. This will show your ex that you are not upset or affected by the break-up, you are no longer wistful, and that you have found your peace.
- Try a simple text: If you want to start contact again, a text is the best option. It will not only help you avoid awkward conversations or silences, but also give your ex enough time to respond. A neutral text is a good initiating gesture. For instance, you could text, “Hey, I learned there is a sequel to your favorite movie in progress. It reminded me how much you loved the first part. Just thought of you when I got to know.”
- Make contact comfortable, not awkward: When you and your ex catch up after a long gap, make sure the text or call makes you both feel comfortable. Talk about general things like music or shows that you both enjoy.
- Initiate a good conversation: When talking, make sure not to dwell on bad or regretful moments of the past. Instead, talk about the good times you shared—the time you tried a fun adventure, went on a vacation, booked a fancy restaurant, etc. It could make your ex feel nostalgic.
- Be the person you are: When you happen to meet your ex, do not be too eager to show that you are the same person that you were in the past. You are what you are now, and they need to accept this fact. Be yourself, even if it means that you have changed since the time when you were seeing each other.
- Be cool: This is a mantra for many. Don’t fantasize about getting back together with your ex. Even after you both have initiated contact, avoid obsessing about meeting or communicating with them. Remind them why they fell for you, but also give them space to miss you back.
- Don’t be an attention seeker: Avoid begging for attention—do not do something drastic by thinking “how to make my ex feel jealous” Even if you wish to grab their attention, do not make it an overt and desperate act. For instance, unless you are comfortable going out on dates, do not go just to make it apparent to your ex.
- Talk about new things in your life: Show them how you have evolved and tried new things. Give them a snapshot of people you met, or hobbies you took up. You can send a simple, subtle text or share your escapades on social media. Let them occasionally know what you have been doing.
- Show care but not always: Express your affection but in a subtle way. Wish them on their birthday or Christmas or get them a card. Do not go all out! These small gestures will let them know that they still hold a special place in your life.
Frequently Asked Questions
1. How long will it take for my ex to miss me?
This could depend on various factors like how serious the relationship was, whether it was long, if there is another person involved, etc. There is no point in spending your days wondering “does my ex miss me?” It might take a few weeks, or months, or it might never happen. Moving on and focusing on your happiness is more important.
2. How should I make my ex miss me if he has blocked me?
If he has blocked you, be happy and engage in activities that bring you joy and peace. He will miss you when he sees you enjoying your time with yourself and your friends. Also, don’t try to contact him, as it may make him think you are still into him.
3. Does no contact make your ex miss you?
It is likely but not guaranteed. For example, if there are sure signs your ex still has feelings for you, the distance could make them miss you. But it might have no effect if the relationship has run its course.
4. Is it better to block or ignore an ex?
Depending on the circumstances, you may choose to do either. For example, if the thoughts of your ex are bothering you, you may consider blocking them. Otherwise, ignoring your ex should be enough.
5. What are the psychological tactics of making my ex miss me?
Humans tend to fixate more on the absence and negative side of a situation than on the presence or positive side. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, as they say. Thus, the psychological tactic you could use is scarcity. Being unavailable, not responding to texts, not initiating contact, and hanging out with your friend group, that is, limiting your presence, can make your ex miss you.
6. How can I make my ex jealous in a healthy way?
To use jealousy to make your ex miss you, but in a healthy way, don’t overtly flirt with others or get into a rebound relationship. Instead, focus on self-improvement — exercise, find a new hobby, learn a new skill, and do things that make you happy. When they see you being happy, they might long for you.
Sometimes you may want to settle down things with your ex or get back into the relationship after a breakup. You may even wonder how to make your ex miss you. However, while you figure out how to maintain your relationship, remember to give yourself enough time to think and adjust to the new situation. If you still believe that reconnecting with your ex is a good idea, avoid stalking them, meet new people, pamper yourself, and indulge in your hobbies. It will attract your ex and help you see a newer version of yourself. Remember to make the entire process enjoyable and gradually encourage your ex to reciprocate your feelings.
Infographic: Ways To Make Your Ex Miss You
You and your former partner are not together anymore. But you want to ensure that you are always on their mind and they miss being with you. How? The answer to that lies in this infographic. We made a list of ways by which you can ensure that your ex recalls you.
Illustration: Top 20 Secret Tips To Make Your Ex Miss You
Learn how to make your ex miss you after a breakup! Follow these 6 simple steps and get them back in no time!
Personal Experience: Sources
MomJunction articles include first-hand experiences to provide you with better insights through real-life narratives. Here are the sources of personal accounts referenced in this article.
i. How to move on from a breakup….and maybe get them back one day;https://roseviewslife.wordpress.com/2016/09/30/how-to-move-on-from-a-breakup-and-maybe-get-them-back-one-day/
ii. When an ex texts;
https://macsmoments.wordpress.com/2014/09/02/when-an-ex-texts/
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