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It takes effort to keep a girl interested in you. While you may have turned on the charm and found the girl of your dreams, your relationship may lose its spark if you stop putting in effort. What started as the best and most beautiful relationship of your life may begin to fall apart with time if you start to take things for granted. Whether you are dating, a few months into a relationship, or married, it takes diligent efforts to keep your lady-love happy. This post provides you with some ideas to ensure her love for you doesn’t fade with time. These practical strategies can keep her engaged and help you build a stronger connection.
Key Pointers
- It is not uncommon for couples to fall out of love, and therefore many men look for tips to keep their women interested in them.
- Most often, men begin taking their partners for granted, and that may be a reason for a relationship to fall apart.
- Supporting your girl when she needs it, appreciating her, being loyal to her, and loving her with all your heart are some of the many ways to keep a girl interested in you.
20+ Ways To Keep A Girl Interested In You
1. Don’t become complacent
You have dressed up well and presented yourself very well while courting her, but now that she is yours, you meet her in your running shorts or track pants. Letting yourself grow shabby could make her feel that you are taking her for granted. Just because she is yours now, it does not mean you have to stop looking good. Besides, it is always good to flatter yourself with good attire. Dress well and present yourself properly when you are with her so that she knows you are the same handsome man she fell in love with.
2. Take control
When you go on a date, endear yourself to her with some planning. Don’t leave all the decisions to her. A girl will stay interested in you if she knows you can take control of the situation and plan a nice evening for her. Also, make sure you pick things she likes to do. For instance, don’t take her to a baseball game if she doesn’t like the sport. Intrigue her with your choices so she gets inquisitive to see what happens next.
Quick tip3. Be mysterious
A girl loves to discover new things about you slowly; hopefully, good things! Don’t spend your first date blurting out your whole bio-data to her. If there is nothing left to find out, it’s likely she will soon get bored. Instead, tantalize her by being mysterious. Give her limited information and let her come back for more.
Jessica Opare Saforo, content creator behind her relationship channel Digital Entrepreneur, shares that the key to keeping a girl interested is to be mysterious without being too overwhelming during the early phase. She says, “I met a guy once, we went out for a date, and within three hours I knew everything about this guy’s life. To be honest, it was too much information in too little time (i).”
4. Be a gentleman
Just because you have been dating her for a while does not mean the girl doesn’t like to be pampered. Open doors for her, pull out the chair, pick up the bill; woman loves a courteous man. Don’t limit these gestures only to the time when you court her. Good manners help create a lasting positive impression on your loved one.
5. Don’t be a ‘Yes’ man
As much as she wants you to agree on certain things, a girl likes to be challenged sometimes. This does not mean you have to defy or argue about everything, but she does enjoy a healthy debate or different perspective. If you want to fascinate her, show her that you have a strong personality by engaging in healthy debates over safe topics. Even if you are completely smitten by her, you need to challenge her sometimes and not constantly say ‘yes, ma’am’ to everything she says.
6. Understand when she needs support
Contrary to the above point, understand when she needs a shoulder to cry on or help with a decision. If she comes to you with a problem, don’t immediately start offering advice. Sometimes, all she needs is a listening ear free from judgment or alternative viewpoints. Be her pillar of support, and she will admire and treasure you.
Quick tip7. Don’t stop flirting
Whether you have been together for a while now or even married with kids, never stop flirting with her. Keep the compliments coming randomly as surprises. Entice her with flowers on the way back from work, call or text her sweet messages in the middle of the day, or plan and ask her out on a date as you would before. The “I love you, I miss you” should never stop. The ideas are endless.
8. Appreciate her
Compliment her achievements, whether at work or home. Don’t take things she does for granted. Show that you adore and appreciate every little thing when required because she would love it. Everything she does is a part of her allure and the reason you started liking her. If you don’t show her how much you appreciate her efforts and hard work, she will lose interest in doing them and also in you.
9. Make her your priority
This can often be tricky because you may want to hang out with the guys instead of going to an opera with her. However, whenever possible, make her your priority. Captivate her attention with your presence. Don’t choose to work late on her birthday or be late for a date because you were catching up with an old friend on the phone. This also goes for long-term decisions like a job transfer. Make her feel she is part of your decisions, and you are trying to work things in ways that work the best for her.
10. Maintain physical contact
As per a study published in the American Journal of Family Therapy, increased physical affection is linked to higher relationship and partner satisfaction, with specific acts like cuddling, kissing on the lips, and hugging being especially correlated with ease in conflict resolution (1). So, hold hands, move her hair from her face, draw her nearer on the sofa, or even hug her from behind when she is cooking alone. Even when she is angry, these simple gestures can woo her.
11. Talk about your relationship
Every relationship will have problems, and you must not brush them under the carpet. Take responsibility and have a conversation to iron out the differences. Also, if you are looking for something more out of her and she does not seem to be thinking alike, make sure you communicate your intentions clearly so you are on the same page. If she has disagreed with you over something, you can win her heart by talking about your feelings.
Do remember12. Make alone-time for both of you
Maybe you share the same group of friends, or maybe you have children now but always make some time for just the two of you. Take her away from the regular people and routine and show her how much you like to spend time with her alone. Bewitch her with a romantic dinner or a quick weekend getaway.
13. Continue on your life goals
Continue to develop yourself as a person, be it hobbies or your life’s ambitions. Don’t be laid back and lazy about your interests. As much as she likes to be your priority, she also wants her man to be standing on his own feet and becoming a strong personality. Your successes will keep her impressed with you.
14. Be kind to everyone around
We hear several stories about men who may pull out chairs for their women but are rude to a waiter at the restaurant. This can really put her off. Be kind to everyone since it is a quality every woman loves. They feel you are not only trying to impress her but are genuinely a nice and kind person and this will attract her to you.
15. Fulfill her physical needs
Don’t be selfish and only think of what gives you pleasure. Even in bed, make sure she receives as much pleasure as you do. Do things that turn her on and not just what you enjoy because, as per studies, sexual contentment is the main predictor of relationship satisfaction in both sexes. Plus, women find interpersonal closeness extremely important when cohabiting with their partners (2). So, remember to do things that can spice up your relationship.
16. Give her space
Showing her you are interested in her does not mean you have to smother her or suffocate her constantly. Every person needs their personal space to do their own thing. Don’t constantly question her whereabouts or ask to be a part of everything she does. This may not seem like the best thing to do when you are looking for ways on how to make her miss you or be interested in you, but remember, distance makes the heart grow fonder.
17. Be adventurous and exciting
It will get quite boring soon if all you do is sit on the couch together and watch TV or go to the same restaurant each weekend. Outdoor activities are always fun and exciting. If that was not reason enough, a study published in the American Journal Of Family Therapy states that people who participate in novel tasks with a romantic partner report high feelings of security, reliance, and trust (3). So, try new things together. Go on a hike, take a roller-coaster ride, or romance on the beach at night.
18. Have great conversations
Romance and intimate talks are all good, but a woman likes to have interesting conversations as well. There are many things to talk about with a girl. From world affairs, politics, sports, spirituality, childhood, and party ideas, to your dreams, and even funny experiences, the conversation topics are many. When such great conversations happen, not only will she be impressed by your know-how, but she will be challenged to match your conversation skills.
Quick tip19. Take up activities together
While you might not be clear-cut on how to make a girl want you, a study published in the Psychology of Woman Journal states that engaging in activities that both partners enjoy can strengthen emotional connection and help resolve conflicts. It can also create lasting traditions that enhance their relationship (4). Whether it is a sport or going to the gym together, doing an activity together is a great way to bond and challenge each other in a healthy way.
20. Be genuinely interested in her
Don’t just date her for her looks. Remember, the attraction will be short-lived, and she will soon lose interest in you, and not to mention, may even get hurt in the process. Pursue her only if you are genuinely interested in her and not because you only enjoy the chase.
21. Don’t be hasty
This is very important if you have just started dating or are still figuring out where both of you want to go with your friendship. Don’t be hasty in taking things forward at a quick pace. Spend time learning more about each other’s personalities. Focus on developing a bond and nurturing it. When you take things slowly and steadily forward, it is bound to keep the girl interested in you.
22. Buy gifts for her
This gesture will make her believe that she is someone you value and think about. Bringing her gifts would keep her interested because it shows you care. When you pick gifts based on what she likes, it makes her feel special and helps you connect better. You can surprise her with gifts on special days or randomly add excitement to your relationship and make things interesting. You don’t always need expensive stuff, even small, thoughtful things like notes or homemade items can mean a lot. Try to indulge in planning gifts that involve doing things together, like going to a show or a short trip and creating good memories. Don’t forget to express your feelings with a note attached to the gift, as it will make her feel more connected to you.
23. Understand her love language
Understanding her love language is key to deepening your connection. Whether she values words of affirmation, gifts, physical touch, or quality time, knowing how she experiences love can help maintain her interest and strengthen your bond.
24. Work on your emotional intelligence
Recognize, understand, and manage your emotions and your partner’s to make your relationship positive. Working on your emotional intelligence will help you express yourself more clearly, making her feel heard and valued. It also enables you to understand her emotional shifts and determine whether they are influenced by something you’ve done or external stressors. With improved emotional intelligence, you can even resolve conflicts calmly.
25. Resolve conflicts
Conflicts are normal in any relationship, but how you manage them can make or break your connection with your special one. Whenever conflict arises, resolve it through open communication and logic. Avoid dragging out the topic or ignoring the problems, as this can lead to resentment and make you seem uninterested in the relationship. Instead, try to create a space where she feels safe to express her thoughts and work to solve the conflict amicably.
Sooraj Chandran, in his blog Musings on Relationship, writes, “Fights happen. Disagreements happen. Sometimes it takes longer to solve, sometimes it ends up in a fistfight (Yes!). The key is not letting those fights last longer than a few hours.” He adds, “Among the imperfections, everyone is gifted with strengths. The key is identifying these strengths early, using those to propel each other forward in life (i).”
Frequently Asked Questions
1. What makes a girl lose interest in a guy?
A girl could lose interest in a guy when she notices disloyalty or changing behavior in him or when he suddenly becomes overly possessive, judgemental, or too involved in her life.
2. How can I keep a girl interested in me in a long-distance relationship?
Keeping your partner interested while in a long-distance relationship could be difficult. However, you may keep the spark alive in your relationship by keeping her posted about your whereabouts, asking deep questions, sharing your pictures, romantic songs, and letters, or sending a surprise gift or care package.
3. How should I keep a girl interested while texting?
Texting a girl is a great way to keep in touch and take your relationship to the next level, provided you do it the right way. Sharing exciting stories, popping thoughtful questions, starting fun conversations on a topic, or sharing a voice note, pictures, and videos are some ways of keeping your girl interested over a text.
4. How can I make a lasting impression on her?
To leave a lasting impression, be authentic and fully engaged. Show genuine interest in her thoughts and feelings and create meaningful moments together. The idea is to grab her attention all while building a solid foundation for your relationship.
Knowing how to keep a girl interested in you can help ensure the spark in the relationship is not lost. Be a gentleman, be mysterious, understand her needs, support her, appreciate her, and make her your priority to win a woman’s heart. Talking about your relationship, being kind to the people around you, and giving her space and alone time are other things she will appreciate. Further, achieving your life goals together, spending quality time together, and having great conversations can deepen your relationship.
Infographic: Everyday Things You Can Do To Keep Her Interested
Love is not only about the big gestures. It is also about the little things, and these are the things that matter the most. In addition to the secret ways we have mentioned above, we present an infographic with a list of things you can do for her in your everyday life, which, in turn, will help her appreciate you and keep her interested. Illustration: Momjunction Design Team
Illustration: Secret Ways To Keep A Girl Interested In You
Image: Stable Diffusion/MomJunction Design Team
Learn the 16 best ways to keep a new girl interested in you! Discover how to keep a woman interested and make your relationship last.
Personal Experience: Source
MomJunction articles include first-hand experiences to provide you with better insights through real-life narratives. Here are the sources of personal accounts referenced in this article.
i. Musings on Relationship.https://soorajchandran.medium.com/musings-on-relationship-348e7d2e3a72
References
- Andrew K. Gulledge et al.; (2003); Romantic Physical Affection Types and Relationship Satisfaction
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/247510498_Romantic_Physical_Affection_Types_and_Relationship_Satisfaction - Natalia Maja Józefacka et al.; (2023); What Matters in a Relationship—Age, Sexual Satisfaction, Relationship Length, and Interpersonal Closeness as Predictors of Relationship Satisfaction in Young Adults
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10001731/#:~:text=Sexual%20satisfaction%20proved%20to%20be,women%20cohabiting%20with%20their%20partners - Kassandra Cortes et al.; (2020); Our adventures make me feel secure: Novel activities boost relationship satisfaction through felt security
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/340817781_Our_adventures_make_me_feel_secure_Novel_activities_boost_relationship_satisfaction_through_felt_security - Fatemeh Abbasi Kharaju et al.; (2024); Exploring the Role of Shared Leisure Activities in Women’s Marital Satisfaction
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/381590964_Exploring_the_Role_of_Shared_Leisure_Activities_in_Women’s_Marital_Satisfaction
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