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Knowing how to make your boyfriend feel loved goes a long way in deepening your relationship. Whether he appreciates words of affirmation, acts of service, or quality time, you should tailor your gestures to his preferences. Small affectionate gestures of love are key to a successful and fruitful relationship. If your guy goes all out to make you feel cherished and brighten up your day, you should also make him feel appreciated by showing your love.
So, don’t hesitate to make your boyfriend feel valued by doing romantic things for him. Although he may tease you and act unmoved, deep down, he likes these gestures. Here, we give you a few tips to understand your boyfriend’s love language and help you make him feel cherished.
Key Pointers
- Reciprocate his love and care for you with sweet and thoughtful gestures, such as surprising him or participating in the activities he likes.
- Put in some effort, dress up, be a good listener, and support his work to show him you care.
- Above all, love your boyfriend for who he is and work together through the shortcomings.
How To Make Your Boyfriend Feel Loved: 40+ Simple Ways
It is not the big gestures that make men feel loved. The following are some simple ways that make your boyfriend feel special.
Words & Sentiments
Meaningful and heartfelt words are enough to make your man feel special. And where words fail, your sweet sentiments behind your actions can move his heart.
1. Appreciate his efforts
Whenever your boyfriend goes the extra mile and does something for you, acknowledge it and thank him for the same. Tell him how much you appreciate his efforts and how grateful you are for everything he does for you. Expressing gratitude for a partner’s actions promotes positive feelings and strengthens the relationship. A study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships indicated that perceived partner appreciation can help boost relationship satisfaction. The study mentions, “A positive violation is a behavior that exceeds expectations, for example, when a partner who typically prefers to stay inside decides to accept their more extraverted partner’s invitation to go out for the evening. Such behaviors trigger the attention of the receiver and lead to positive outcomes, such as liking the enactor more, finding them more socially and physically attractive, and deeming them as an interesting and valuable interaction partner. Thus, a positive violation typically provides an evaluative boost for the actor and, on a relational level, can subsequently increase relationship satisfaction (3).”
2. Support him
If your boyfriend is working hard toward achieving a goal, then be supportive of his ambition. If his work keeps him occupied most of the time, tell him you are proud of his hard work instead of complaining about it. If he is training for a marathon, offer to go for a run with him. If he’s studying for an important exam, surprise him with his favorite snacks and a motivational note. Support does not necessarily have to be a grand gesture, it can be also about showing up when he needs you the most.
3. Text him sweet messages
Click a cute picture of yourself and send it to your boyfriend, who is miles away for work or any other reason. When you miss him, let him know. Let him know you are looking forward to seeing him.
4. Seek his opinion
When you have to make an important decision in life, seek his opinion. Show him you value his opinion and that you take his views seriously. Also, it shows that you respect him and trust his judgment. It will also make him feel honored that you value his input in your life choices.
5. Accept him the way he is
The biggest mistake you can make in a relationship is trying to change your boyfriend. If you want him to feel loved, accept him with his flaws. Do not offer unsolicited advice. Instead, love him for all that he is and grow together. For instance, if he is an avid fan of soccer, instead of complaining, try learning about his favorite game or watching with him occasionally. Similarly, if he is an introvert, do not pressure him into being overly social. Appreciate his quiet, thoughtful nature. By supporting his individuality, you can create a deep emotional connection with him.
6. Share a poem
Baking is a special way to communicate your feelings. Even if your creation isn’t flawless, it is produced with love and attention. Your heartfelt effort will surely be welcomed and appreciated, regardless of taste or appearance.
Thoughtful & Personalized Gifts
Gifts are a great way to make your boyfriend feel loved. Here are some ideas for thoughtful gifts you can plan for your dearest boyfriend.
7. Make a scrapbook of memories
Collect photos, ticket stubs, and little mementos from your relationship and compile them into a scrapbook. Gift the scrapbook to him on your anniversary, his birthday, or any other special occasion. This thoughtful gift will remind him of all the wonderful moments you’ve shared and show how much you value your time together.
8. Make him a love jar
Write all the reasons you love your boyfriend on small pieces of paper. Roll or fold these notes carefully and put them inside a lovely jar. Spritz the jar lightly with your favorite perfume and let him pick and open each note every day. If not every day, you can ask him to pick a note each time you have a fight or argument. Your notes are sure to melt his heart.
9. Shop for him
If you come across something that would suit your boyfriend when out on a shopping trip, buy it for him. If he has been waiting for a quirky gadget and you can help him acquire it then do it for him. These sweet gestures show you think of him even when he is not around.
Quick tip10. Create a ‘how we met’ video
You can create an animation or a simple sketch illustrating the story of how you both met. Another fun idea is to ask your friends to share their views of you both as a couple and combine them into a beautiful video. You can also ask mutual friends to share their first impressions of your relationship. This creative and heartfelt gift is something he can treasure forever.
11. Give him a gift
Plan a treasure hunt for him on Valentine’s Day or his birthday and let him find a special gift. Create innovative hints to lead him on this thrilling journey before revealing the ultimate surprise.
12. Make a playlist
You can make a playlist of your favorite songs that bring to mind your cherished memories together. This is a sweet gesture for your boyfriend just like a modern-day mixtape of shared memories and emotions.
13. Find him great sneakers
If your boyfriend loves sneakers, surprise him with a pair of personalized sneakers. Allow your imagination to run wild when it comes to the artwork. You may also make amusing stick figures of the two of you together.
14. Dedicate a song
Whether it’s a karaoke night with friends or a private duet, choose a song with a special message for your lover and dedicate it to him. This spontaneous gesture is a meaningful way to express your feelings to him. Research indicates that sharing a song that holds special meaning can strengthen emotional connections. Couples often associate specific songs with their relationship, which further strengthens their bond (5).
15. Give him flowers
One of the sweetest gestures you can do for your boyfriend is surprising him with a bouquet of flowers. Most men rarely get flowers as a gift and your action will surely make him feel special.
Caring Gestures
Words and gifts cannot have the kind of deep impact on a person the way caring gestures can have. Your thoughtful gestures for your man can tell him the deep feelings you have for him.
16. Take an interest in his life
Ask your boyfriend questions about his life, such as his likes and dislikes, best friends, and everything else. Also, go beyond the general questions and try to ask follow-up questions. For instance, if he is studying for an upcoming exam, you can ask him how it went after he is done with the exams. When you show interest in knowing him better, it makes him feel loved and desired.
17. Surprise him
Research shows that unexpected positive actions can help create novelty and strengthen the bond of love shared between two people (1). Your boyfriend may not have been surprised often. Some simple ways can be posting a love note on the mirror for him to read first thing in the morning, send him a “love you” text out of the blue, or send him flowers at work even when there is no occasion to celebrate. Such gestures show that you think about him even when you are apart.
18. Make time for him
The most precious thing you can give a person is your time. Research by National Center for Biotechnology Information indicates that shared activities and time investment can lead to greater relationship satisfaction. The research states, “The quality of the relationship, the history of the shared experiences, the sense of attachment, and the beliefs which arise from the whole experience have all been recognized as modulating the well-being of the partners. Despite the fact that the wide range of aspects mentioned in the research makes it difficult to establish how direct an effect these relationships have on well-being, there is a broad consensus in the literature that love is one of the strengths most closely linked to personal happiness, and is associated with higher rates of self-esteem, safety, satisfaction with life, positive affect, and achievement of personal and relational goal” (2). So, ensure you and your boyfriend spend some quality time with each other regularly. Quality time can be in the form of date nights or weekend getaways. Spend time together as a couple by indulging in activities he enjoys. You can spend some alone time with each other by removing all distractions. You could also talk about your daily activities or plans for the future.
Ellen Nguyen, a book author and wife, shares what makes her husband feel so loved and cared for by her. She says, ”From very early on in our relationship, my husband wanted to spend lots of time together. He asked to meet me frequently, and he started to call me during lunch breaks. I wasn’t used to this at first as most guys I knew were afraid of closeness. But I was receptive to him because I had good feelings about him and I enjoyed being around him. It also made me quickly realize he showed love through receiving and giving attention, and I wanted that too (i).”
19. Give him space
Identify his space and give him some quiet time to do his things. Men crave their ‘me time’ to think and ponder over their life. Do not restrict him from meeting his friends and family. Encourage him to spend some time by himself to show how much you care for him. This will make him feel respected like he is in a trusted relationship.
20. Share the expenses
Offer to pay for a meal when you are out on a date or share general expenses with him. Do not let him feel burdened because of the expenses of going on a date. When you show you are willing to contribute financially it makes him feel appreciated and shows him how serious you are about the relationship.
21. Listen to him
There will be times when your boyfriend will want to speak his heart out. Listen to him patiently and show him that you care about his problems and struggles without judging him. When you listen to him, he will feel accepted and welcomed the next time he wants to share something. Active listening is extremely crucial in building strong relationships. When individuals know they are being genuinely heard, it builds trust and empathy (4). Blogger Jo Helen Murphy shares how she learned the importance of active listening and having a tumultuous relationship. She says, ‘We were in the middle of another fight. Screaming. Crying. Slamming doors. I just wanted him to listen to me, to understand how hurt I was. To hold me and stroke my hair and tell me how sorry he was. Instead, he was yelling. “You’re not LISTENING!” Eventually, we were too exhausted to fight anymore. In a hollow voice, I told him what he wanted to hear just to end the fight and go to bed. He knew I was faking it and said so. I refused to give anymore. We fell asleep on opposite sides of the bed. Uncomfortable. Broken. Lonely… “I haven’t been listening to you,” I told him. Slowly, I walked through a couple of his main complaints in our marriage. “I know you feel like you come last in my life—that I’m willing to drop everything for everyone but you—I’m really sorry. That’s not how I feel. But I know that’s how I treat you and it’s wrong. I’m going to try harder to put the needs of our family before the needs of others. Will you please forgive me?” Something special happened that day. Several years’ worth of pain and hardness had built up in my husband’s eyes. That day, that hardness softened. He took me in his arms and stroked my hair (ii).”
22. Cook for him
Prepare his favorite meal. Look for the recipes online, put on your apron, and show off your cooking skills. Pay close attention to the presentation, and pair the meal with champagne and slow music.
23. Go on a road trip
If your partner is adventurous, take him on an unexpected road trip, whether to another country or a hidden cottage in the countryside. Listen to your favorite tracks, relish good food, and make memories for life.
24. Coordinate a boy’s night out
If you are concerned about allowing him to go on a boys’ night out, or if you frequently need to call him home, think about giving him a break, even if it’s just for a little bit. Get in touch with his buddies and help them plan a boy’s night out. Allow him to enjoy himself with his friends. When he knows you are by his side, he will develop deep feelings for you.
25. Bake a cake
Spend time together as a couple by indulging in activities he enjoys. You can spend some alone time with each other by removing all distractions. This will strengthen your bond.
Fun & Playful Interactions
Sprinkle some fun interactions in your relationship to make lasting memories that will strengthen your bond.
26. Join him in activities
If your boyfriend loves watching action movies or likes to explore the city on a bicycle, then join him. Taking interest and joining him in his favorite activities shows how much you care about his likes. He will feel encouraged and supported to pursue his likes and interests.
27. Be spontaneous
When he comes home tired after work, give him a back massage or when he tells you he has bagged a big contract, buy him flowers or a cake to celebrate his achievement. Sharing his happiness makes him feel loved and cared for. Sharing his happiness will make him feel adored and celebrated.
28. Love coupons
Write handwritten notes offering little perks like ‘Claim control of the TV remote,’ ‘Enjoy a 15-minute massage,’ or ‘A day free from chores.’ Although it may come out as corny, your boyfriend will surely appreciate this gesture.
29. Slip a secret note
Write something beautiful and romantic and let him find it. This thoughtful act can come as a pleasant surprise to your boyfriend at a moment when he least expects it. If you do this, he may think of you all the time.
Romantic Actions And Dates
Do not let the romance die too soon. Here are some romantic actions and dates to excite him and make him happy.
30. Compliment him
When he wears something new or achieves something, acknowledge it by complimenting him. Instead of a general ‘you look nice,’ try a compliment that is more specific. For instance, you can say ‘this shirt really brings out the color of your eyes’ or ‘I loved how you handled the situation so patiently.’ Do not go overboard with your compliment but do let him know that you notice even slight changes in his appearance. This will make him feel assured that you pay attention to the little details and appreciate his efforts.
31. Praise his skills in bed
Men care about their skills in the bedroom. After a hot and intimate session between the sheets, you can tell him how good he made you feel. Giving him feedback boosts his confidence, and he will try to perform better as well. Don’t forget to ask him for what you want, either—men love knowing that you are receiving pleasure too. It doesn’t hurt to make him feel reassured.
Quick tip32. Dress up for him
Surprise him by wearing the dress he likes the most. When you meet him, put in some extra effort to look different than usual. Suppose he says he likes to see you in a particular color, you can wear an outfit of that color on a special date to make him happy. Men love it when you put in the effort to look better for them.
33. Hug him
Who doesn’t like to get cozy in a hug? Hug him when he’s had a tough day to remind him he’s not alone. Hug him when he’s cooking for you to show your appreciation. Hug him when he’s watching a movie to make the moment even cozier. And on some days, hug your boyfriend for no apparent reason. Let your embrace be a silent yet powerful way to express your love and support. Hugging him shows him how much you love him. Let your warm hug convey your feelings for him. Let your warm hug convey your feelings for him and make him feel protected and comforted in your embrace.
34. Keep eye contact with him
Looking at someone with love is the simplest way to their heart. So, when your boyfriend is speaking with you, look deep into his eyes with a soft smile on your face. Avoid looking into your phone when he is with you. Give him your full attention and show him how much you love him.
35. Kiss him
Your boyfriend must be heading out for some work, or he drops you home, or you are alone with him in the park, pull him close and plant a soft but passionate kiss. Kiss him when he is least expecting it. Kiss him without warning. Let him know that you appreciate his presence and company.
36. Touch him often
When you are out with him, stand close to him and make physical contact. Hold his hands and sit close to him or place your hand on his knee when he is sitting beside you. Your light touch is a silent way to convey your love for him.
37. Massage his head
This is one of those small gestures that quietly let your man know how much you adore them. You may gently massage your partner’s head while watching TV or after a tiring day at work. It’s a gesture that helps express deep affection with no cost.
38. Tickle him
Act as if you’re genuinely hurt if he does something mildly upsetting. When he asks for your forgiveness, engage in a tickle fight until both of you are out of breath from laughter. The relief of not being sad, combined with shared laughter, will bring you closer to one another and strengthen your bond.
39. Dance for him
Flaunt your dance moves when the two of you are alone. If you truly want to impress him, learn any exotic dance forms, such as belly dancing, and make his jaw drop. If not an exotic dance, you can try to make him laugh with an impromptu goofy dance that he will enjoy.
40. Arrange a surprise date night
Plan a surprise date night for your beloved. Whether it’s a movie night, a dine out, or clubbing, the planning and effort that went into the surprise will bring him joy.
41. Make him breakfast in bed
Sharing a poem with your boyfriend is one of the most sweet and beautiful gestures. You can pen down adorable words to describe your boyfriend or choose a poem that conveys your feelings and read it to him if you cannot write one.
Waking up to a sumptuous breakfast made specially for him is sure to please any guy. He will appreciate the thought and effort you put into it and will reciprocate appropriately.
What Not To Do In The Process
No doubt the above gestures will help you win your beloved’s heart. However, sometimes your loving behavior can unintentionally have an opposite effect. Here are some things to avoid when trying to make your boyfriend feel loved.
- Do not overdo the surprises: While surprises can be exciting, some people may not appreciate it. Excessive surprise gifts or plans can overwhelm him. For example, you may plan a surprise birthday party for him by inviting his friends and family. However, he may not like the idea as he may prefer spending some private time with you. So, before you think of surprising him, ensure he is comfortable with that level of excitement.
- Do not try too hard to make him happy: You might start watching his favorite game or TV show and pretend to be enjoying it only to make him feel happy. However, if he senses the fake enjoyment he might not like it and might feel irritated by your efforts at impressing him. So, keep your efforts genuine. Do not force yourself to like something that he likes. It is okay to have different preferences.
- Do not expect grand gestures in return: When you do something for your boyfriend, do it out of unconditional love. Doing anything with the expectation of getting something in return will only disappoint you and make you frustrated. If he does not plan surprises for you the way you plan for him, do not get angry with him. His way of showing love may be different, so accept it and be happy with the one you love.
- Do not neglect daily communication: Expressing love is not only about grand gestures but also about everyday communication. You may go out of your way to make him feel happy, however, do not forget to be there for him when he needs you. Perhaps he just wants you to listen to him. So, do not neglect regular communication.
Blogger Charles Bill shares a similar opinion. When he stopped getting along with his wife, he realised perhaps open communication could help them. He says, ’It wasn’t a perfect conversation. I stumbled over my words, unsure of how to explain the things I had buried so deep. But something shifted that night. It was like a door had cracked open, and through that small opening, a little bit of light started to filter in. For the first time in a long time, I felt hopeful. After that, things didn’t magically get better overnight. We had spent years building walls, and those don’t come down with a single conversation. But slowly, we started to change the way we communicated. I made a conscious effort to talk more openly, to share the things that scared me or made me uncomfortable. And more importantly, I started to listen. I mean really listen — not just to her words, but to what she was trying to tell me underneath them. I learned that sometimes, the things left unsaid are the most important. There were still bumps in the road. Old habits die hard, and there were days when I’d slip back into my old patterns of retreating into myself. But Cynthia was patient. And I started to notice something I hadn’t before: the more I opened up, the more connected we became. It was like building a bridge between us, one small brick at a time. The more we talked, the more I realized how much we had both been missing out on. I had been so afraid of conflict, of showing vulnerability, that I had missed the chance to really know her — to know what she was feeling, what she needed, what she dreamed of. And the same went for her (iii).” - Do not be inconsistent: If you want to make him feel loved, ensure you make consistent efforts. Showering him with lots of love on special occasions and then failing to appreciate him the other times will only dampen all your efforts. Be consistent in your efforts and let him know how much you truly love him.
Frequently Asked Questions
1. How can I make my boyfriend feel loved even when we are apart?
You can send him his favorite preservable food item prepared by you, text him sweet nothings to tell him how much you miss him, and try to pay him a surprise visit and plan the rest of the day for him. These are some of the things girls do that guys love and your boyfriend will appreciate you for these gestures.
2. How can I make my boyfriend feel loved when he’s going through a tough time?
There are several ways to show love and affection to your boyfriend during difficult times. You can ask him if you can help him in any way. Tell him you admire his hardworking nature and love him for never giving up. Assure him that you have his back no matter his situation.
3. What are some unique ways to show love to my boyfriend based on his interests?
Consider incorporating his hobbies into your expressions of love. For example, if he loves sports, surprise him with tickets to a game or gift him a personalized jersey. Alternatively, if he enjoys artistic things, you could make him a scrapbook or write him a romantic letter. Taking small steps and tailoring your gestures based on what he likes can make him feel appreciated and loved on a deeper level.
Boyfriends are sometimes underappreciated. They, too, deserve to be admired, loved, nurtured, pampered, and cared for, just as they do to their partners. So now that you know about the things to do for your boyfriend to make him feel loved, don’t waste time and get started with the ideas. These may be simple sweet gestures and tips but can go a long way by making a big impact on him. So don’t hold back and use these to get closer to him and make him realize how special he is to you. However, remember that while the advice above may be useful for many people it may not necessarily be universally applicable. Some people might require a more nuanced approach that considers diverse relationship dynamics, cultural backgrounds, and individual preferences.
Infographic: Personalized Gifts For Boyfriend
Whether you are in the initial stages of dating or have been together for a long time, treating your boyfriend to a fabulous gift can make his day and leave him thrilled. So, take your cues from this infographic to pick a memorable and enchanting present for your man. Illustration: Momjunction Design Team
Illustration: Adorable Ideas To Make Your Boyfriend Feel Loved
Image: Stable Diffusion/MomJunction Design Team
This video provides you with 5 tips on how to show your man your love and appreciation.
Personal Experience: Source
MomJunction articles include first-hand experiences to provide you with better insights through real-life narratives. Here are the sources of personal accounts referenced in this article.
i. 4 ways i make my husband feel loved daily, according to my husband;https://ellengau.medium.com/4-ways-i-make-my-husband-feel-loved-daily-according-to-my-husband-8d34c498b998
ii. How I Learned to Listen to My Husband;
https://www.familylife.com/uncategorized/how-i-learned-to-listen-to-my-husband/
iii. How I Saved My Marriage by Changing the Way I Communicate;
https://medium.com/hello-love/how-i-saved-my-marriage-by-changing-the-way-i-communicate-9a1c0aa75375
References
- Joshua R. Pederson et al.; (2020); Relational Surprise Experiences as a Unique Form of Relational Maintenance.
ttps://interpersona.psychopen.eu/index.php/interpersona/article/view/3647/3647.html - Mercedes Gómez-López et al.; (2019); Well-Being and Romantic Relationships: A Systematic Review in Adolescence and Emerging Adulthood.
ttps://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6650954/ - Giulia Zoppolat et al.; (2019); A nice surprise: Sacrifice expectations and partner appreciation in romantic relationships.
ttps://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/0265407519867145 - Using Active Listening to Enhance Your Relationships.
https://extension.usu.edu/relationships/faq/using-active-listening-to-enhance-your-relationships - Celia B. Harris et al.; (2019); “They’re playing our song”: Couple-defining songs in intimate relationships.
https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0265407519859440
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