When You Feel Attracted To Someone, Do They Feel It Too?

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Two People Looking At Each Other With Mutual Attraction

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When you feel attracted to someone, do they feel it too? This question might linger on your mind when you are interested in someone. Whenever they are around, your cheeks get flushed, butterflies flutter in your stomach, and your knees go weak. Somewhere deep inside, you want to know whether or not they also feel drawn to you.

In other cases, if you are casually dating or hanging around, it is common to find that urge to know if they are smitten by you. The best way to do this is to observe them with sincerity and look for signs indicating they are fascinated by you. In this post, we will tell you about a few ways by which you can tell whether or not they are attracted to you.

In This Article

Key Pointers

  • If a person is always curious to know more about you and finds excuses to talk to you, it could be a sign they are attracted to you.
  • One of the best ways to find out whether they like you or not is to observe their body language around you.
  • Look for subtle signs they give out in your presence.

What Are The Factors That Influence Attractions?

Several biological, social, and environmental factors can play a crucial part in influencing attraction.

  1. Physical attractiveness: The appearance of a person is a major factor that influences attractiveness, especially if you’re meeting someone for the first time. Appearance may include facial features, body shape, height, and clothing.
  2. Similarity: If the person shares similar preferences, food habits, and behavior to yours, the attractiveness quotient increases.
  3. Proximity: If you meet someone often, i.e., if they live in the same neighborhood or attend the same school/college, the chances of interactions also increase. It can lead to increased attractiveness towards the person.
  4. Familiarity: Even if you have mutual friends, the idea of familiarity between you two can make one feel comfortable and breed increased attractiveness.
  5. Personality and communication skills: People are more likely to get attracted to those with good communication skills and a sense of humor as they make them feel good about themselves.
  6. Social and cultural factors: Family and religious values can also influence your romantic attraction towards another person. However, this might not hold true for everyone.

When You Feel Attracted To Someone, Do They Feel It Too?

Here are some signs to know they are attracted to you the same way you are.

1. Curiosity

Do they keep asking questions to you or your friends about you? They seem to want to know more about you and pay attention to the smallest details about you. You may find them asking random questions about your life. Most of all, they want to know if you are seeing someone else. This curiosity could be a vital sign that they are indeed allured by you.

protip_icon Be Watchful
It’s natural to be curious about someone you like, and it’s okay to ask questions and get to know each other. However, if they start becoming overly intrusive early in your relationship, it may be a red flag that they are not respecting your boundaries.

2. Reciprocity

They reply to your messages, emails, and calls without taking much time. If you guys often communicate, see if they reciprocate your actions and energy. Also, observe if they are as interested in talking or meeting you as you are. To know about it, plan a date and see if they are excited. Their level of excitement will tell you how much you have charmed them.

3. Body language

Understand body language to know if someone is attracted to you

Image: IStock

Have you ever been lured by someone’s charm, only to wonder if they reciprocate your feelings? You don’t need to be an expert to understand the basic body language of someone. Simple acts such as being nervous around you, stumbling on words, or fidgeting are signs of anxiousness. These signs could mean they are cautious about making a good impression. Uncrossed arms, open shoulders, holding a gaze, fixing the hair or shirt, and licking one’s lips are all signs that they accept your presence and want to impress you. Blushing is a good indication that they are captivated by you. Also, it is natural for someone to be awkward around someone they like. So talking very fast or being clumsy might also indicate that they are enamored with you.

4. Smile

As simple as it may sound, if the person you like has a spontaneous smile around you or can’t stop smiling when talking to you, they are most likely interested in you. A smile is a sign of happiness, comfort, and attraction in the face of someone truly enchanted by you. It sends out positive vibes between you two.

5. Mirroring behavior

Mirroring behavior could be a sign of attraction

Image: Shutterstock

A person interested in you will unconsciously mimic some of your behavior and actions, such as holding the glass, ordering the same coffee, or even moving their hands like you do. Often, they start using the phrases you usually use. These are signs that the person is infatuated with you and is aligning with you to create a bond. They are trying to get your attention. It could also mean they find your behavior cute and is enraptured by you.

protip_icon Did you know?
Research shows that behavioral mimicry serves as an implicit self-regulatory function in relationship maintenance, as it can help establish rapport, build trust, and strengthen social bonds (1).

6. Communication

If your love interest has beguiled you through frequent conversations over the smallest of things, they could be interested in you. Texting you throughout the day, asking you about your work, seeking your advice on something, and pulling a conversation longer are signs that they are attracted to you. Also, a comfortable silence when you are together indicates romantic chemistry. All these show they are amazed and intrigued by you and want to spend more time with you.

7. Physical touch

A simple touch could raise the adrenaline levels in the body, sparking chemical reactions that attract you to someone. Physical touch, here, refers to something beyond ‘accidental brushes against your skin.’ If they put their hand on your back while crossing the street, protectively maneuver you through a crowd, or try to hold your hand, they are obsessed with you.

8. No barriers

Getting close to you is a sign of attraction

Image: IStock

It is a simple gesture that lets you know if the person you like is attracted to you. For example, if you two are out for dinner, they move the salt and pepper cellar on the table or a cushion placed in between. It shows they are crazy about you and are trying to get close to you.

9. Attentiveness

It is an essential sign to notice when you both are together.

If someone is interested in you, they will be attentive to your words and actions. They may even look awed and enthralled by the way you speak. They will make eye contact while you speak. If they are easily distracted or not paying attention to your presence or comments, they may not be interested in you as you are.

protip_icon Quick tip
Reciprocate their attention by being attentive to them. For instance, put your phone on silent and make frequent remarks/ask questions. It will demonstrate that you are listening and value their thoughts and feelings.

10. Initiative

If the person of your interest takes the lead to make plans, arranges surprises for you, takes care of small details, picks you up and drops you home, invites you for a show or dinner date, they are impressed by you. The person who is attracted to you will not wait for you to ask every time. They will be just as excited to make plans with you as you are. They may be tempted to spend more time with you, seeking opportunities to interact and deepen the connection.

11. Dilated pupils/ blinking

Someone interested in you will try to hold your gaze

Image: Shutterstock

The eyes say it all! It may sound technical but look into their eyes when you talk and see if their pupils dilate. Big, attentive eyes indicate that they are taking in as much of you as possible. Also, someone madly in love with you will try to hold your gaze and blink less.

12. Glowing skin

When you are around someone you like romantically or feel enticed by them, your heart beats faster. It makes the skin look flushed and glowing. Love interests activate happy hormones, which show up through a bright radiance in the skin. If they like you, they would be gleaming around you.

13. Vocal tone

You will notice that if you are admired by someone, they will try to sound sexy and personal. They would talk in deeper and slower tones and make you feel like their words are just for you. You may even notice their excitement as they talk.

14. Leaning in

Leaning in is a sign of attraction

Image: IStock

If you are desired by someone, that person often leans in to get closer to you or whispers something in your ears. They make excuses to be closer to you by moving the body forward to strengthening the conversation. It is because they are interested in you!

protip_icon Research finds
A study suggests that during a brief “get-to-know-you” discussion, people tend to use flirting behaviors that correspond to their flirting style (2).

15. Emotional vulnerability

When someone feels comfortable enough to share personal stories, fears, or insecurities, it often shows a deeper level of trust and attraction. Opening up emotionally indicates they value the connection and are interested in building a more meaningful relationship.

16. Introduction

The final scorer is that your love interest has invited you to meet their family or friends. It’s a way to get approval and include you in their close circle. But mind you, this introduction is only during intimate family get-togethers or in a small group. Don’t mistake a house party for 50 people at their house as a sign of interest!

Frequently Asked Questions

1. What does soulmate connection feel like?

The timing of meeting is perfect, you feel connected to them almost instantaneously, you may feel like you have known them for the longest, and there are no negative feelings such as jealousy or judgment, and you may even feel telepathy. To top it all off, your heart will signal that this is the one for you.

2. Is it possible to project your feelings of attraction onto someone else?

It may be possible for individuals to project their feelings of attraction onto someone else. Projection occurs when someone attributes their romantic or sexual feelings to another person, perceiving them as more interested or attractive than they are. It can happen due to personal desires or unresolved emotions. It’s essential to be aware of projection and strive for self-awareness to avoid misinterpreting others’ intentions. Open communication and understanding can help ensure clarity in relationships.

3. Is it normal to feel attracted to someone you don’t know?

Yes, feeling attracted to someone you don’t know is normal. Generally, initial attraction is based on superficial factors like physical appearance. Still, it’s essential to recognize that deeper compatibility requires getting to know a person on a personal level.

4. Does attraction come naturally or can it be forced?

Attraction is an innate and spontaneous response that arises naturally, primarily based on personal preferences and chemistry. It can’t be forced or manufactured. Individuals can try to enhance their attractiveness or create opportunities for connection, but genuine attraction results from personal compatibility and shared experiences. Therefore, it is vital to allow attraction to develop naturally and focus on building authentic relationships based on mutual interest and connection.

5. What is the difference between physical attraction and emotional attraction?

Physical attraction is based on a person’s physical appearance, while emotional attraction relies on the connection and bond felt on an emotional and intellectual level. Physical attraction is focused on external factors, while the emotional appeal is rooted in deeper understanding and compatibility. Both can be important in relationships; the balance between them is essential to maintain a good relationship.

6. Can someone’s feelings for you change over time?

Yes, feelings may change over time. Feelings are dynamic and can be influenced by various factors such as personal growth, experiences, and shifts in circumstances. It is natural for emotions to evolve and fluctuate in relationships. Someone’s feelings for you may deepen and grow stronger or change in intensity or direction.

You feel seduced by someone’s personality, are attracted to them, and believe they like you too. However, you can’t be too sure, though. There’s no way to tell whether or not someone is interested in you, and it might not be love at first sight after all. Some physical and behavioral symptoms may indicate that something is present, but don’t make any assumptions until they come to you and express something. It is preferable to directly or indirectly inquire about the person’s feelings toward you. But, in the meantime, keep things going as usual and savor every moment you have with your special someone! It will give you a clear image from which you can determine if you want to continue with them or not.

Infographic: How To Know If Someone Is Mutually Attracted To You?

It can be really stressful for you if you like someone but aren’t sure if they feel the same way about you. Confessing is the best way to proceed in this situation. However, if you lack confidence or don’t want to risk losing their friendship, look for the obvious signs of mutual attraction in the infographic below.

clear signs that the attraction is mutual (infographic)

Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

Illustration: When You Feel Attracted To Someone Do They Feel It Too?

when you feel attracted to someone do they feel it too_illustration

Image: Dall·E/MomJunction Design Team

References

MomJunction's articles are written after analyzing the research works of expert authors and institutions. Our references consist of resources established by authorities in their respective fields. You can learn more about the authenticity of the information we present in our editorial policy.
  1. Johan C Karremans and Thijs Verwijmeren; (2008); Mimicking attractive opposite-sex others: the role of romantic relationship status.
    https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18453390/
  2. Research Defines More Behaviors That Reveal Romantic Attraction.
    https://news.ku.edu/2015/02/12/just-time-valentines-day-research-defines-more-behaviors-reveal-romantic-attraction

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Shreshtha Dhar
Shreshtha DharM.A, M.Phil
Shreshtha Dhar is a licensed Clinical Psychologist with a professional experience of around seven years. Presently, she operates her private practice, Thought Craft, based out of Kolkata. She has special interest in the emotional and behavioral issues of both children and adults.

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