Why Do Older Men Like Younger Women: 9 Possible Reasons

An older man with a younger girl

Image: Midjourney/ MomJunction Design Team

The love stories of celebrities like William Shatner and Elizabeth Shatner, Beyonce and Jay Z are well-known. In most of these relationships, the male partner is several years older than the female partner. There are several other couples like them with a significant age difference between them. So, what attracts an older man to a younger woman? You must have wondered what part of such relationships appeals to them and makes them get into one.

Keep reading to know about the most common and possible reasons that can make a man fall for a woman much younger than him and why there is a possibility that things might just work out in the right direction for them.

In This Article

Why Do Older Men Like Younger Women: 9 Possible Reasons

Here are a few possible reasons that could attract older men towards younger women.

1. They bring out their sense of youth

Younger women make them feel youthful

Image: Shutterstock

Not every person likes the idea or the realization that they are getting old and gone are the days when they were youthful. Thus, some older men like to be involved with younger women as it helps them participate in more youthful activities, be a part of new trends, and pursue their passions. It makes him feel revitalized and younger at heart.

protip_icon Point to consider
For some men, having a young attractive woman by their side at social events is a matter of pride. Being desired by a younger woman makes them a subject of admiration and envy amongst other men.

2. They make them feel wanted

Younger women tend to feel attraction to older men because they make them feel safe and secure both emotionally and physically. At the same time, if the older men are yearning for someone to make them feel wanted, this relationship dynamic can give them just that.

3. They like to guide

Older men feel good about guiding their younger partners

Image: IStock

When partners are of the same age or have a minimum age gap, they may not like to have someone who is always preaching. But younger partners with a desire to learn and would not deny listening to practical lessons for life. While on the other side, older men feel good about sharing their experiences and guide their younger partners on the right path.

4. They get a chance to cope with their mid-life crisis

Men in their mid-40s and 50s could be susceptible to going through a midlife crisis. It is a time when they look for someone at their side who can make them relax and have fun in life. Hence, being in a relationship with a significantly younger woman brings them a sense of satisfaction that they still have their charm, which also is a big boost for them. They find the adoration of younger women mentally refreshing.
Most men who get into a relationship with younger women have either been through a rough divorce or had a bitter fallout with their significant other. Thus, they are charmed by younger women and date them to feel a kind of a rebound to get over that bitter experience.

6. They are open to experimenting

Older men may love to spend time with a lively young woman

Image: IStock

If a man is craving for some experimenting, there is a high probability that he would choose to spend time with a young girl as she is lively, carefree, and most probably open to trying new things in life.

7. They do not bother about commitment

Some men believe in the ideology that young women are more inclined toward short-term relationships and do not expect much to come out of them. Thus, if he is not so serious either and finds a young lady on the same page, then showing amorousness by indulging in an affair and some flirtation would be ideal.

Many young women may prefer the lack of commitment older men bring, but it might not necessarily be a good thing in the long run. Michelle Brown, a blogger who dated many older men in her 20s, wishes she respected herself more and realized her worth. She says, “I did learn some lessons from those older men. I learned that very few of the older men who wanted to spend time with me actually had any intention of being in a long-term relationship. Many of them were incapable of holding down a real relationship with a mature woman their own age. Presumably, that’s why they preyed on younger girls. I learned the hard way that if you don’t respect yourself and your body, no one else will either (i).”

protip_icon Point to consider
Commitment-phobic men may believe that older women are focused on getting married and having a baby as their biological clock is ticking. Younger women still have time so marriage and kids may not necessarily be their priority.

8. They let their partner pilot the relationship

Older men bring a sense of security

Image: IStock

Older men have had their share of life experiences and relationships and have a clear idea of what to do and not do in a relationship. Younger women tend to have a fondness for this trait in them as it brings in a sense of security and assurance. Hence, it is a win-win situation.

9. They may want the control

Older men may want to be a dominator

Image: IStock

With partners of the same age or less age gap, it might be tricky to have control over the relationship. However, with a younger partner, the older one tends to have command due to their age and experience. So, if the older man looks forward to a relationship wherein he can be the dominator and show his Possessiveness, he would like to have a younger woman as a partner.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Are there any potential negative consequences for relationships with a significant age gap between partners?

Some potential negative consequences may include conflicting interests, emotional dissatisfaction, social stigmatization or discrimination, increasing health concerns, and familial rejection or disapproval. However, these can be dealt with consciously by the partners with proper communication, consent, mutual trust, and adequate professional support.

2. How do social conditioning and cultural expectations influence the preference for younger women among older men?

Social conditioning and cultural expectations may pressure older men to seek out younger partners to reinforce gender roles, beauty standards, power dynamics, and physical attributes on youthfulness or reproducibility. In Western societies, spouses of similar ages are common. However, in Asian cultures, including China, India, and Japan, it is almost customary for the husband to be older than the wife. It reflects on the belief that older men will be more mature, stable, responsible, and financially secure for a marriage, while younger women will be more fertile and beautiful.

3. Do older men who date younger women face any stigma or criticism from society?

Dating after 50 or even 40 can be challenging as older men who date younger women may be judged for perceived power imbalances, questioned about motives, or labeled ‘manther’ or ‘creepy.’ However, societal attitudes and opinions regarding older men dating younger women vary greatly depending on cultural, social, and individual factors. While some may view such relationships as normal, others may make assumptions about the motivations and dynamics involved.

4. Is there a power dynamic at play in relationships between older men and younger women?

In relationships between older men and younger women, there can be a potential power dynamic due to differences in life experiences, resources, and societal expectations. However, it’s important to recognize that power dynamics can vary greatly from relationship to relationship, and factors such as mutual respect, communication, and individual agency play significant roles in shaping the dynamics within any given relationship. It is essential to prioritize consent, equality, and the well-being of both partners.

5. How does social media influence older men’s preference for younger women?

The glorification of youthfulness and beauty of young women on social media can influence older men’s preferences. Having an attractive partner is often considered a status symbol for older men. Moreover, celebrity couples and the portrayal of relationships in media can influence older men.

It is essential to mention that not all older men dating younger women have the same outlook or exact reasons for their actions and decisions. When in love, age is a mere number, and it is the feelings, sentiments, and emotions that matter the most. Younger women have affection and even romantic attraction towards older men because they have a planned life and are mature, while older men feel an infatuation for younger women because they bring the excitement and spark back into their regular mundane lives.

Infographic: Why Older Men Like Younger Women

Love does not see age, and a happy relationship between an older man and a younger woman is a perfect example. If you, too, wonder about such couples, this infographic can put things into perspective. From seeking youthful happiness to wanting a sense of control, there may be different reasons why older men may want to date younger women.

what may attract an older man (infographic)

Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

Key Pointers:

  • Physical needs, excitement, and youthfulness are joint driving forces in older men falling for younger women.
  • Young women also add a touch of delight and adventure to their daily monotonous lives and spark their interest.
  • It is also vital that you assess your feelings thoroughly and think about your decision before committing to a relationship.

Illustration: Reasons Why Older Men Might Like Younger Women

Why Do Older Men Like Younger Women_illustration

Image: Stable Diffusion/MomJunction Design Team


Men are drawn to younger women because of their youthful energy and beauty. It’s an age-old attraction that’s hard to ignore.

Key Pointers

  • Participating in youthful activities and trends makes younger women make older men feel youthful.
  • Younger women tend to make older men feel wanted, as they feel more attracted to them.
  • Older men enjoy sharing their experiences and guiding their younger partners.
  • Coping with mid-life crises becomes easier for older men when they date younger women.
  • Younger women admire older men’s sense of security and control, while older men may enjoy experimenting and not necessarily want commitment.

Personal Experience: Source

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Jessica Jefferson
Jessica JeffersonMA, MS, LMFT
Jessica Jefferson is a licensed marriage and family therapist and a certified perinatal mental health professional who is trained to help clients suffering from mental health disorders like anxiety and depression. She graduated with a Bachelors in Psychology from the University of Miami, a Masters in Psychology in Education from Teachers College, Columbia University and a Masters in Family Therapy from Nova Southeastern University.

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