10 Tips On How To Overcome Sexual Performance Anxiety

10 Tips On How To Overcome Sexual Performance Anxiety

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Lovemaking is an integral part of every relationship. Although it’s not the be-all and end-all of it, couples do look forward to getting intimate as often as they can. For, not only does it give pleasure, but also helps them bond with each other at a different level altogether. Yet, there are times when either or both of them can suffer from performance anxieties. Most of the time it might be due to the pressure of impressing or satisfying the other. And, if this pressure continues to grow unchecked, it can create frictions and cause a negative impact on the overall relationship. Therefore, it is better to address these anxieties before things spiral out of control. Here are a few ways that you can do so:

In This Article

1. Discuss With Your Partner

Discuss With Your Partner

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First and foremost, effective communication is the key to a healthy relationship. If you’ve been worrying about your performance lately, who better than your partner to discuss something as intimate as this? So, bare it all to your partner in an intimate no-holds-barred discussion. Your better half is sure to understand your concerns and together you both can work on possible solutions.

2. Give It Some Time

Give It Some Time

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Most couples don’t often understand the importance of foreplay before the actual intercourse. And, in a hurry to perform, they might miss the ultimate goal of achieving the big ‘O’. So, make sure you indulge in a lot of hugging, kissing, caressing, and enjoying the whole process before you let yourself go!

3. Be Creative

Be Creative

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Over a period of time, couples can easily get bored of ritualistic lovemaking routines. This might soon turn into disinterest, affecting your performance. Try to liven things up in between the sheets by focusing on some sensuality as well. Use lovemaking toys, role plays, or some clever use of lighting to get you both hooked on to each other.

4. A Healthy Diet

A Healthy Diet

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A healthy diet is absolutely necessary for a good life, let alone a great love-life. And yes, you might lose a little bit of your strength after each lovemaking session. So, it is vital for you to consume a balanced, healthy diet. Incorporate foods which are considered aphrodisiacs into your diet to give yourself that extra push.

5. Exercise Regularly

Exercise Regularly

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There is no denying that lovemaking is physically tiring. And, if you are someone who’s not into exercising, then you might easily tire and give up before climaxing. Exercising not only keeps you fit but will also increase your stamina, which will help you stay in the game for a longer time.

6. Avoid Stress And Anxiety

Avoid Stress And Anxiety

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Agreed you have problems. But simply stressing about it is not a logical solution, right? Try not to think too much about your issues or get anxious. Rather, focus on finding the right solution along with your partner and it is sure to yield positive results!

7. Don’t Fall For Fantasies

Don't Fall For Fantasies

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Most men and even women set unrealistic expectations for themselves after watching online intimate fantasies. What you need to remember is that everything you see online is not realistic in any manner. In real life, neither do men perform the way the actors do in those fantasies nor do real women enjoy such fantasies. And, most importantly, in real life, it is more about the love you both have for each other than just the physical aspect.

8. Get Comfortable In Each Other’s Skin

Get Comfortable In Each Other's Skin

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Sometimes, you don’t really have to get into the act the moment you get in-between the sheets. Take some time off once in a while and just ‘hang’ around in bed – feeling, chatting, massaging, and caressing each other. This way the pressure to perform will be off your mind and you’ll be at ease in each other’s company.

9. Look For Other Erogenous Zones

Look For Other Erogenous Zones

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Most of us do not spend enough time trying to find other ways of exciting each other. We just focus on a few tried-and-tested routines and stick to it. Try and explore other erogenous areas in each other and you’ll be surprised to know how many of those there really are!

10. Be Regular

Be Regular

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Finally, the best way to beat your performance anxiety is to continue to make love regularly. Do not do the mistake of giving up on it simply because you assume you are not good enough. For, how long do you think you’ll continue to fail? The tide will eventually turn in your favor if you relentlessly pursue it.

We hope that these tips prove helpful to you. However, if the problem persists, do not shy away from consulting a sexologist. A sexologist will address your problem in a systematic manner and help you regain your confidence soon. Good luck!


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Sadiya Qamar
Sadiya QamarContributor
Sadiya is a writer and editor with a passion for writing about parenthood and children. Her focus areas are health, wellness, and beauty. For MomJunction, she writes on kids’ health and nutrition.  Sadiya believes in doing in-depth research and providing accurate information to help parents with concerns on their children’s growth and development